Form up...
This was originally intended as a diet blog. I was going to minutely record my successes as I blazed my way to the glory that is thin and beautiful, while keeping a journal of all the wonderful ways my life opened up as I became more mobile. I would let everyone follow my meanderings through the local landscape, mooch along with me as I explored the cityscapes I've always taken for granted, lean over my shoulder in admiration at all the artistic wonders I'd produce with my boundless new energy.
Yeah. Plans never survive the first engagement with the enemy, and I had more enemies than I realised.
Some of them I knew - boredom, depression, agoraphobia, childhood issues that could stretch to the moon and back. Those, I was confident I could overcome. I knew those enemies. I'd observed them, spied on them, built up maps of their incursions into my life. They were easy. It was the hidden enemy that hamstrung me, last time and every time before it. I have a major investment in being invisibly fat.
I'll revisit that, once I get my thoughts in order. It's a big think to think, and it has to be broken up into more easily thinkable lumps. I've spent a lot of the last two years carefully but relentlessly chipping bits of my issues away, examining the shards for the important gems of wisdom before leaving the dross behind me. It's an ongoing process, it might even be a lifetime's work.
In the meantime, I've twice managed to lose some weight and twice managed to gain it back again. Both times, instead of beating myself up for "failing" I've gently but thoroughly examined the entire process, and learned from it. I know what works, what doesn't work, and the things that set me up for a fall. I know the things I like about the process, the things I hate, and the things that need to be done anyway.
I'm nearly ready to try again.
I'm no longer that bothered about being thin and beautiful (and those things are hardly joined at the hip, anyway). I'm bothered about being taken seriously. I'm bothered about my own contentment, and I'm bothered about my future.
I'm no longer so content to be invisible. I don't need it. But I want to be visible on my own terms. I don't what the first and only thing people notice about me to be the amount of real estate I take up.
This blog is not a diet blog. It's a blog about the things that make up my life. The way I eat is part of that, but so is just about everything else.
Move Out...
Onwards.
Tuesday, 28 May 2013
Sunday, 14 November 2010
Comfortable Compromises (Ethical Eating part Deux)
Life is full of compromises, not least when you have several conflicting desires in one specific area. I did manage to find a way of eating ethically that, while not perfect (because really, perfect is unattainable and would be dull if it were), suits me and my household well for the present.
First of all, I turned to the internet and that one modern joy that this Luddite truly appreciates - internet shopping, and found me an organic delivery company for the weekly shop. I found another company that deals with organic meat, game and rare breeds. And I found a company that sells organic grains, pulses and other dry goods and staples in some kind of bulk. Those companies are :-
Abel & Cole - weekly vegetable box and grocery delivery company
Blackface Meat Company - seasonal, organic meat, rare breeds and game
Goodness Direct - dry goods, cereals, pulses and other grocery supplies
I've had good service from all three during the past two years, but Abel & Cole do stand out as a firm that goes above and beyond the call of duty to keep their customers happy. Also, their ethics are second to none. All their vegetables are UK sourced (and that, dear readers, is my compromise on the 'Local' front) and any fruit that comes into the country - citrus, pineapples, coconuts - are shipped in, not airfreighted. Their bread and other baked goods are outsourced to local small artisan bakeries and baked to order, and they have an arrangement with a local zoo to pass on any fruit and veg past their best, so waste is at a minimum.
Now, I'm nowhere near well organised enough to get all my groceries this way, but I've managed to reach a happy medium. Almost 100% of the meat, milk, eggs and butter that comes into this house is organic - the rest is free range. I would say that 85% of all fruit and vegetables is also organic, a lot is fairtrade. Most dry goods coming in, and about half the tinned or bottled goods are organic also. Coffee and most chocolate is Fairtrade - sadly not all the tea is, because I just get through so much of it.
One thing that is undeniable - this way of eating costs more. In some parts of Europe where quality is more valuable than quantity, they do spend a lot more on food than is the UK national average, and I spend a comparable amount. I'm lucky that I can do it, and I'm well aware that a lot of people just can't. And if I can't do it this way at any point in the future, then I'll have to sit down again, and make another list of compromises. One thing won't change, though - I'm 100% committed to Humane Farming, so the only meat, eggs, butter and milk here will be Free Range as an absolute minimum. All other things are negotiable.
xxx
First of all, I turned to the internet and that one modern joy that this Luddite truly appreciates - internet shopping, and found me an organic delivery company for the weekly shop. I found another company that deals with organic meat, game and rare breeds. And I found a company that sells organic grains, pulses and other dry goods and staples in some kind of bulk. Those companies are :-
Abel & Cole - weekly vegetable box and grocery delivery company
Blackface Meat Company - seasonal, organic meat, rare breeds and game
Goodness Direct - dry goods, cereals, pulses and other grocery supplies
I've had good service from all three during the past two years, but Abel & Cole do stand out as a firm that goes above and beyond the call of duty to keep their customers happy. Also, their ethics are second to none. All their vegetables are UK sourced (and that, dear readers, is my compromise on the 'Local' front) and any fruit that comes into the country - citrus, pineapples, coconuts - are shipped in, not airfreighted. Their bread and other baked goods are outsourced to local small artisan bakeries and baked to order, and they have an arrangement with a local zoo to pass on any fruit and veg past their best, so waste is at a minimum.
Now, I'm nowhere near well organised enough to get all my groceries this way, but I've managed to reach a happy medium. Almost 100% of the meat, milk, eggs and butter that comes into this house is organic - the rest is free range. I would say that 85% of all fruit and vegetables is also organic, a lot is fairtrade. Most dry goods coming in, and about half the tinned or bottled goods are organic also. Coffee and most chocolate is Fairtrade - sadly not all the tea is, because I just get through so much of it.
One thing that is undeniable - this way of eating costs more. In some parts of Europe where quality is more valuable than quantity, they do spend a lot more on food than is the UK national average, and I spend a comparable amount. I'm lucky that I can do it, and I'm well aware that a lot of people just can't. And if I can't do it this way at any point in the future, then I'll have to sit down again, and make another list of compromises. One thing won't change, though - I'm 100% committed to Humane Farming, so the only meat, eggs, butter and milk here will be Free Range as an absolute minimum. All other things are negotiable.
xxx
Tuesday, 19 October 2010
I Try So Hard To Be Good (Ethical Eating Part the First)
Once you start thinking that, perhaps, you should be taking more notice of the food you eat, you start reading up on the subject (or you do if you're me, at any rate). There is a plethora of articles, books and websites out there telling you where your daily bread comes from, how far it travels and how soused in petrochemicals your eventual toast and jam for breakfast is.
It gets confusing.
The terms Organic, Free Range, Locally Sourced, Fairtrade, Permaculture, Seasonal, Food Miles, Monoculture all get jumbled up until you give up and phone out for a pizza to get your head straight again.
I decided a couple of years ago, that I was going to attempt to eat and shop in a way that supported my ethical and moral beliefs. Hopefully, anyway. I sat down, read a few books and made a short list of what was most important to me.
Humane Farming
Eat organic or free range meat, eggs, dairy and fish to ensure that the animals were content, healthy and able to express natural behaviour!
Yup, that's really important to me (checks box) Organic or free range it is from now on!
Biodiversity
Buy food produced on small farms that encourage local wildlife through hedges, wetlands and fallow field systems!
Again, that's important to me (checks another box) Will be looking out for small, named producers and supporting those who work with Nature. Yay! This is easy!
Fairtrade
Buy goods for which the producers were paid a fair wage, allowing families to raise themselves out of poverty!
That's always been important! No change in habits there, then (makes note)
No Processed Food
Cut down the number of non-nutrient chemicals you ingest by cooking and baking from scratch, using only basic fresh ingredients! No unpronouncable preservatives, colours or chemical flavourings!
Hmmmm... but... butbutbut...
The first wobble of uncertainty creeps into my resolve at this point. I sometimes enjoy cooking, sometimes I don't. I always loathe washing up the kitchen afterwards. And sometimes? Sometimes I just want a pan of pasta with a jar of Sacla sun dried tomato pesto and some fried bacon. I'll be buggered if I'm making pesto from scratch every time I need comfort food!
But... cutting down the number of unnecessary preservatives I eat IS important to me. And buying less processed food will cut down on food miles also - all those ingredients had to travel to the factory after all, before travelling on to me. Gah! This being responsible lark just got a lot less fun...
But! You can buy organic pesto! And organic other things too. So it should be feasible to cut down on the processed food, but still have access to the odd jar of sauce or tin of baked beans without being bowed down with guilt and too much sodium. In theory, anyway. YAY! The Great Change in Eating Habits is still on! This is good enough news to break out the exclamation marks more than once in a paragraph!
Eat Seasonally
Cut down on unnecessary food miles! Don't expect strawberries to eat with your Christmas pudding, don't get a hankering for stuffed peppers in January!
Okay! Actually, this shouldn't be too difficult. I like Winter vegetables and I do realise that the out of season stuff that gets shipped here from other countries tends to be tasteless and very expensive. So this is something that's important enough for me to make a little extra effort. We're back on track at last. And I may secretly be pleased with the challenge of making parsnips New and Exciting week after week after wee(sob)... By Damn, I will MAKE myself pleased!
Eat Locally
Cut down even more food miles! Support your local farmers, keep your money in your local economy, keep farmland from being covered in executive starter homes and save local wildlife!
Ah...
And here, dear friends, is where we come to a screeching, grinding, sparks flying halt. Because, much as I love Yorkshire - and I really, really, really do love Yorkshire - we are not exactly weighed down with an overabundance of good food all year round. From now until February, when the rhubarb comes in, we basically produce Kale.
So, while this last is very important in my grand scheme of things (eating locally, that is. Not Kale), I needed to find a compromise. If I had a car and I could cruise the winding country lanes looking for farm shops, perhaps it wouldn't be such a show-stopper. But I can't. So "local" needs to be stretched out to cover... what? How large an area is "local" to me here in the North of England?
It gets confusing.
The terms Organic, Free Range, Locally Sourced, Fairtrade, Permaculture, Seasonal, Food Miles, Monoculture all get jumbled up until you give up and phone out for a pizza to get your head straight again.
I decided a couple of years ago, that I was going to attempt to eat and shop in a way that supported my ethical and moral beliefs. Hopefully, anyway. I sat down, read a few books and made a short list of what was most important to me.
Humane Farming
Eat organic or free range meat, eggs, dairy and fish to ensure that the animals were content, healthy and able to express natural behaviour!
Yup, that's really important to me (checks box) Organic or free range it is from now on!
Biodiversity
Buy food produced on small farms that encourage local wildlife through hedges, wetlands and fallow field systems!
Again, that's important to me (checks another box) Will be looking out for small, named producers and supporting those who work with Nature. Yay! This is easy!
Fairtrade
Buy goods for which the producers were paid a fair wage, allowing families to raise themselves out of poverty!
That's always been important! No change in habits there, then (makes note)
No Processed Food
Cut down the number of non-nutrient chemicals you ingest by cooking and baking from scratch, using only basic fresh ingredients! No unpronouncable preservatives, colours or chemical flavourings!
Hmmmm... but... butbutbut...
The first wobble of uncertainty creeps into my resolve at this point. I sometimes enjoy cooking, sometimes I don't. I always loathe washing up the kitchen afterwards. And sometimes? Sometimes I just want a pan of pasta with a jar of Sacla sun dried tomato pesto and some fried bacon. I'll be buggered if I'm making pesto from scratch every time I need comfort food!
But... cutting down the number of unnecessary preservatives I eat IS important to me. And buying less processed food will cut down on food miles also - all those ingredients had to travel to the factory after all, before travelling on to me. Gah! This being responsible lark just got a lot less fun...
But! You can buy organic pesto! And organic other things too. So it should be feasible to cut down on the processed food, but still have access to the odd jar of sauce or tin of baked beans without being bowed down with guilt and too much sodium. In theory, anyway. YAY! The Great Change in Eating Habits is still on! This is good enough news to break out the exclamation marks more than once in a paragraph!
Eat Seasonally
Cut down on unnecessary food miles! Don't expect strawberries to eat with your Christmas pudding, don't get a hankering for stuffed peppers in January!
Okay! Actually, this shouldn't be too difficult. I like Winter vegetables and I do realise that the out of season stuff that gets shipped here from other countries tends to be tasteless and very expensive. So this is something that's important enough for me to make a little extra effort. We're back on track at last. And I may secretly be pleased with the challenge of making parsnips New and Exciting week after week after wee(sob)... By Damn, I will MAKE myself pleased!
Eat Locally
Cut down even more food miles! Support your local farmers, keep your money in your local economy, keep farmland from being covered in executive starter homes and save local wildlife!
Ah...
And here, dear friends, is where we come to a screeching, grinding, sparks flying halt. Because, much as I love Yorkshire - and I really, really, really do love Yorkshire - we are not exactly weighed down with an overabundance of good food all year round. From now until February, when the rhubarb comes in, we basically produce Kale.
So, while this last is very important in my grand scheme of things (eating locally, that is. Not Kale), I needed to find a compromise. If I had a car and I could cruise the winding country lanes looking for farm shops, perhaps it wouldn't be such a show-stopper. But I can't. So "local" needs to be stretched out to cover... what? How large an area is "local" to me here in the North of England?
Sunday, 1 August 2010
Airshow 2
Here be some photos of planes, for those who are interested. And a few random seagulls :) As before, some pics were taken by The Welshman, some by me - I was using my old balky point and shoot as my DSLR is on sick leave, and it shows. Sorry!
This is a Dakota...
And, here it is again
This isn't a Dakota...
and neither is this. It's a B-52 doing a single fly past, though it did do so on both days.
The F-16 pilot was performing his first season as a display pilot, and clearly loving every minute of it
Wheeeee!!!
The regular residents of the area were not impressed...
This is a Dakota...
And, here it is again
This isn't a Dakota...
and neither is this. It's a B-52 doing a single fly past, though it did do so on both days.
The F-16 pilot was performing his first season as a display pilot, and clearly loving every minute of it
Wheeeee!!!
The regular residents of the area were not impressed...
Saturday, 31 July 2010
On a Wing, a Prayer, and a family sized Tub of Sunburn Soother
Sunderland International Airshow 2010
I like airshows. I wouldn't expect to, I have less than zero interest in mechanics, engineering and the collection of, or playing with, various gubbins. Well, not unless they're yarn related anyway... but I do like airshows. Most of them are hard to get to on public transport or prohibitively expensive to get in, but Sunderland is different. The displays are held over the sea, for a start off, there's a metro station about 15 mins walk away... and it's free.
So, it's on the coast, it was a semi overcast weekend, and those of you who know me will know exactly what that means. Sunburn. OOOh, yes, did I get sunburned - when I took the specs off on Saturday night, there were two little white half moons under my eyes, the rest looked like boiled lobster. Ouch. Of course, this happens at least once a year - for some reason the slight haze and cool breeze at the coast both con me into forgetting that I frazzle as easily as a small snowball dropped into the third circle of Hell.
Anyway, enough bitching and whinging. Pictures were taken. Some of the following were taken by The Welshman, used with permission and all rights retained etc...
First up, the Royal Commandos supported by HMS Winchester attempt to rid the beach of Tourists! uh, I mean, Terrorists!
Um, you keep at it, lads. I'll be sure to send you some coffee over some time in November...
Next post, some actual planes...
I like airshows. I wouldn't expect to, I have less than zero interest in mechanics, engineering and the collection of, or playing with, various gubbins. Well, not unless they're yarn related anyway... but I do like airshows. Most of them are hard to get to on public transport or prohibitively expensive to get in, but Sunderland is different. The displays are held over the sea, for a start off, there's a metro station about 15 mins walk away... and it's free.
So, it's on the coast, it was a semi overcast weekend, and those of you who know me will know exactly what that means. Sunburn. OOOh, yes, did I get sunburned - when I took the specs off on Saturday night, there were two little white half moons under my eyes, the rest looked like boiled lobster. Ouch. Of course, this happens at least once a year - for some reason the slight haze and cool breeze at the coast both con me into forgetting that I frazzle as easily as a small snowball dropped into the third circle of Hell.
Anyway, enough bitching and whinging. Pictures were taken. Some of the following were taken by The Welshman, used with permission and all rights retained etc...
First up, the Royal Commandos supported by HMS Winchester attempt to rid the beach of Tourists! uh, I mean, Terrorists!
Um, you keep at it, lads. I'll be sure to send you some coffee over some time in November...
Next post, some actual planes...
Monday, 12 July 2010
Photo of the Week 4
Once again we visit Leeds Canal Basin. This time we can see a wonderful juxtaposition of one of the most recent buildings in Leeds, and one of the oldest complete ones.
Bridgewater Place (also known as the Dalek) was completed in 2005 and is still the tallest building in both Leeds and West Yorkshire. It is an office / residential complex with retail units at the bottom - thus bringing one step closer the old Sci Fi standby of living, playing and working all in one building. It is a very striking building and can be seen from up to 40km away. There's a particularly good view of it coming into the railway station on my line. Linky above to wikipedia for the curious.
The building in the foreground is now also offices, but was built as a warehouse at the terminal of the Canal - spot the large door opening straight onto the water for lading from the backs of boats. It is so literally at the end of the Canal that Lock no.1, the lock connecting the Canal to the river, stands right next to it. There is a blue heritage plaque on the side (it is a listed building) which reads:
"In 1777 this robust stone building was constructed as a terminal warehouse for the Leeds Liverpool Canal. Started in 1770 the canal was finally completed in 1816 at a cost of £1,200,000 - nearly five times the original estimate"
Sunday, 11 July 2010
So... Hot... Mellllttttinnnngggggg...
It's been a bit warm here recently. Just a bit. In fact, they've been predicting yet another record-breaking day here in the UK this weekend.
Seems we have one of those every year. And they say global warming is a myth ;)
Not a lot has been getting done - the humidity means the knitting yarn is binding to the needles and besides, knitting with hot sweaty hands is a recipe for felted socks. There was a massive Clean Up of House due to welcome visitors the other week, which has inspired me to try to maintain the home in some semblance of neatness. You know, like a so-called normal person? Here's hoping... Though at the moment, laying around sucking ice cubes is more attractive. Even the cats are trying to get every inch of their skin onto the cool kitchen tiles in an attempt to reach a more civilised temperature. Not that those delinquents are ever civilised.
Even the reading is suffering. There are two books on the go right now and they both need more brain power to process than my crispy fried neurons seem capable of providing.
Your Inner Fish, by Neil Shubin, is an account of the finding of Tiktaalik - the earliest link between fish and tetrapods yet found (tetrapods have four true limbs with arm / leg bones and hands / feet and can therefore mostly support their own weight. Fish have fins which are arranged differently and other than a few rare species, cannot support their weight. So Tiktaalik is essentially a 'missing link' between water and land animals). The book also takes the time to explain genetics and the relationship between us humans, as tetrapods, and Tiktaalik and other animals.
The Incredible Human Journey, by Alice Roberts, is about how we became human, and colonised the planet. Roberts followed the story literally, by travelling to Africa and visiting various archaeological sites, then up and out into Southern Asia. This was also filmed for a BBC series, which I did not see, not being a TV watcher. Palaeoanthropology is one of my abiding interests, so this book is fascinating to me - I had no idea that the earliest evidence of use of ochre was 164,000 years old. That is incredibly early to our eyes, considering that modern humans appeared roughly 200,000 years ago. I think that the subject has been so Euro-centric for so long, concentrating on the cave paintings and digs in France, that we've sort of assumed that it was in Europe that modern thinking first arose. But, of course, Humanity arose in Africa and those first people were anatomically identical to us, they could think like us, so why should they wait until they reached France before suddenly 'waking up'? It's a subtle kind of racism brought about by a long history of Euro-centric learning and thinking.
It must be hard to write a popular science book. Not all scientists are natural authors or communicators, and to be able to pitch the information you're imparting to just the right target audience is a very subtle skill even for a professional writer. Shubin and Roberts both have different styles and ways of communicating.
Out of the two books, I'm finding Roberts easier to read. This is probably because I'm not quite the target audience for a popular science book anyway - I'm slightly more knowledgable than the average reader and don't have a lot of patience so I find some books simplistic and grating to read. Shubin's insistence on describing the tetrapod limb as 'one bone, two bones, lotsa blobs, digits' is a case in point - the repetition makes me grit my teeth and gives the impression that the book was written for people of below average intelligence or education. Perhaps it was. Roberts seems more willing to use the more academic language with a brief overview at the beginning.
It could just be a difference in American and British publication styles - I've noticed in other genres of books that US editions seem to rely on in-text interpretations (usually in parentheses) after every instance of an unusual term or word, whereas UK editions stick a glossary in the front or back and have done with it. Both styles have their place, I just seem better able to deal with the latter.
Seems we have one of those every year. And they say global warming is a myth ;)
Not a lot has been getting done - the humidity means the knitting yarn is binding to the needles and besides, knitting with hot sweaty hands is a recipe for felted socks. There was a massive Clean Up of House due to welcome visitors the other week, which has inspired me to try to maintain the home in some semblance of neatness. You know, like a so-called normal person? Here's hoping... Though at the moment, laying around sucking ice cubes is more attractive. Even the cats are trying to get every inch of their skin onto the cool kitchen tiles in an attempt to reach a more civilised temperature. Not that those delinquents are ever civilised.
Even the reading is suffering. There are two books on the go right now and they both need more brain power to process than my crispy fried neurons seem capable of providing.
Your Inner Fish, by Neil Shubin, is an account of the finding of Tiktaalik - the earliest link between fish and tetrapods yet found (tetrapods have four true limbs with arm / leg bones and hands / feet and can therefore mostly support their own weight. Fish have fins which are arranged differently and other than a few rare species, cannot support their weight. So Tiktaalik is essentially a 'missing link' between water and land animals). The book also takes the time to explain genetics and the relationship between us humans, as tetrapods, and Tiktaalik and other animals.
The Incredible Human Journey, by Alice Roberts, is about how we became human, and colonised the planet. Roberts followed the story literally, by travelling to Africa and visiting various archaeological sites, then up and out into Southern Asia. This was also filmed for a BBC series, which I did not see, not being a TV watcher. Palaeoanthropology is one of my abiding interests, so this book is fascinating to me - I had no idea that the earliest evidence of use of ochre was 164,000 years old. That is incredibly early to our eyes, considering that modern humans appeared roughly 200,000 years ago. I think that the subject has been so Euro-centric for so long, concentrating on the cave paintings and digs in France, that we've sort of assumed that it was in Europe that modern thinking first arose. But, of course, Humanity arose in Africa and those first people were anatomically identical to us, they could think like us, so why should they wait until they reached France before suddenly 'waking up'? It's a subtle kind of racism brought about by a long history of Euro-centric learning and thinking.
It must be hard to write a popular science book. Not all scientists are natural authors or communicators, and to be able to pitch the information you're imparting to just the right target audience is a very subtle skill even for a professional writer. Shubin and Roberts both have different styles and ways of communicating.
Out of the two books, I'm finding Roberts easier to read. This is probably because I'm not quite the target audience for a popular science book anyway - I'm slightly more knowledgable than the average reader and don't have a lot of patience so I find some books simplistic and grating to read. Shubin's insistence on describing the tetrapod limb as 'one bone, two bones, lotsa blobs, digits' is a case in point - the repetition makes me grit my teeth and gives the impression that the book was written for people of below average intelligence or education. Perhaps it was. Roberts seems more willing to use the more academic language with a brief overview at the beginning.
It could just be a difference in American and British publication styles - I've noticed in other genres of books that US editions seem to rely on in-text interpretations (usually in parentheses) after every instance of an unusual term or word, whereas UK editions stick a glossary in the front or back and have done with it. Both styles have their place, I just seem better able to deal with the latter.
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